The Funniest, Craziest, and Straight-Up Weirdest Roommate Stories We’ve Heard

For some people, our college roommates become our lifelong friends. They’re the ones we vent about life with, the ones who get to see our ugliest faces on Snapchat, and the ones we’ll be having wheelchair races with 60 years from now. For the rest of us, our roommates are a bit – how do we say – different. We asked our readers to share their craziest roommate stories and they definitely did not disappoint. Check it out!

Plus, click the link at the bottom of the article to submit YOUR story!

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*Stories have been edited for clarity and/or length.

 

1. The Sleep-Talker.

My roommate would talk in her sleep. One night I heard her talking louder than usual, so I asked her if she’s okay. She turned around and she kept asking, “Have you seen Joe? I can’t find him.” I responded, “Who’s Joe? I don’t know what you’re talking about.” This is where it gets a bit strange. My roommate sits up slowly and just turns her head facing me. I feel like I’m in some horror movie and she’s about to jump at me. My heart’s racing at this point and I ask her, “Umm…. Are…. Are you ok?” She then turned her head back forward and slowly layed back down. I just went back to bed and covered myself with my blanket in hopes that she wouldn’t start sleep walking

Submitted by Izzy V.

 

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2. The Queen of B.O.

My freshman year dorm room always had a horrible stench. I was paranoid that I was the source, so I spent a whole day washing every single thing on my side of the room. When that didn’t work, I realized the smell had to be coming from my roommate. I eventually figured out that she had really bad B.O., and the smell would worsen whenever she took off her shoes. Curious as to how somebody could possibly smell so foul, I secretly searched through her belongings to see what kind of soap and shampoo she uses. I searched every corner, every drawer, and every box in the room only to find that my roommate, in fact, did not own any soap at all.

Submitted by Kaitlyn T.

 

3. The Twitter Tough Guy.

My freshman year roommate and I were polar opposites, so we generally kept to ourselves and did our own thing. We were always polite when interacting with each other, so I didn’t think we had any problems. One day I noticed she wrote her Twitter handle on the dry erase board hanging from our mini fridge. I then looked her up on Twitter, only to be surprised by a series of insulting tweets about me on her page. In one of them, she even threatened to throw a rock at my head. Thankfully, there were only two weeks left of school before I got to move out!

Submitted by Sam T.

 

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4. The Cat Bully.

I had an old friend that I hadn’t spoken with much during the last year of high school. She needed a place to live because she had been kicked out of her parents’ house. It took almost no time at all to realize why. She was rude to her mom, who was still giving her cash and groceries. She used her rent money to pay for all sorts of stuff – but not rent. She even burnt my poor, already-skittish cat just for kicks! And she would show up at 2 am, locked out and proceed to pound on the door, screaming and waking up the whole complex.

Submitted by Stacy M.

 

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5. The Thief.

Throughout the year, my roommates and I had cash go missing. Whenever we would bring it up, our other roommate would just say, “I can’t believe you would be that irresponsible!” One roommate had her debit card and phone go missing, and she started getting weird charges on her card. She contacted Lyft, and they told her who the charges were coming from…. our other roommate! We contacted housing and the police and she got kicked out. We also found out afterwards that she stole the phone and had sold it!

Submitted by Nancy R.

 

6. The Chore Dodger.

The beginning of my freshman year of college I was living with two other girls. I brought a microwave and some plastic plates (which I never intended to put into the microwave) and told my roommates that they could use them whenever they needed. One day I come back from classes and saw that one of my roommates didn’t know that plastic and microwaves do NOT mix. The plate she had used was burnt and there were specks of food on it, leading me to believe that she had proceeded to eat whatever it was she had microwaved (OH MY!). I didn’t ask her about it because I was waiting to see if she would say anything. That’s when I discovered that she doesn’t clean up after herself. The three of us had left that plate there for over a week. I ended up switching dorms to live with a new, really compatible friend. It wasn’t until I was clearing out all of my stuff from the room that I threw away the plate.

Submitted by Ashley A.

 

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7. The Hero We All Deserve.

Imagine this.  You wake up at 7 a.m. on a Monday morning (you thought you would avoid this after high school, but sadly, there is still such thing as an 8 a.m. class). You grab your shower caddy and slip on your flip-flops in a half-asleep trance.  The bright light hits you as you walk out the door and stumble into the shower. Since this is the place you normally debate with yourself about the meaning of life, the time goes by fast. The temperature drops 20 degrees once the hot water is turned off, so you instinctively reach for your towel.  But, there is no towel.  What would you do?  Well, I’ll tell you what I did. I stood there dripping for a solid five minutes and weighed the options in my mind. See, they don’t warn you about these situations during college tours.

Option 1. Politely ask the girl in the shower next to you to lend you her towel really quick.

Option 2. This might be a bad time for a nap, but it’s better than any other time.

Option 3. Text your roommate, praying that she got up in time for class today. (Of course, you remember your cell phone instead of your towel! Kids these days.)

Option 4. Wait until the janitor rolls by and snatch her mop; using it as a cover up as you fly to your room.

If you’re Chuck Norris, option No.4 is a no-brainer. But most others, myself included, would probably text the roommate. (If you live in a single, then you’re really out of luck.) To end this story on a good note, my lovely roommate saved my naked butt. Bless you, Mary.  The moral of the story? College is a rough transition, but you’ll get through. I mean, you never hear upperclassmen tell stories like this, so they probably don’t happen right?  Just remember, don’t forget your towel (and avoid 8 a.m. classes as much as possible).

Submitted by Anna C.

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Submit Your Story

Yikes! These stories are definitely unforgettable. Think you can top them? Share your story with us! We just might share it in our next post.

Submit here.

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